Diminutive

  I'm the runt,

 only I am not so

 because I am, or was

 deprived of my mother's milk,

 it is not because I refused 

it neither.

 I am the runt,

because I've been deprived

 of the ability to speak

 my own words and

 of knowing they will

 be heard.

 I am a runt

 because I love

 far too hard and

 in the same ways in none

 of the

 ways are right;

 I am deprived of love

 No not because I never

 receiv[e/d] it

but because I give

Away much more

 than I have in my possession,

 ringing myself dry

 like a sponge,

 trying to darndest

 of every molecule

 of myself to give

 what I find so rare to get.

 I never give any to myself

 as a second or

 third-hand punishment

 for not disturbing to get

 it from,

 why would I give anything to myself?

 I am the runt

 because I dare to dream

 of what I do not have

 my happy ending

 or manufactured retellings,

 my reaching at

 for some kind of silver,

 like I've learned

 some kind of lesson;

 made some kind

 of development;

 had some kind

 of experience… right?

 I am the runt.

 this is why

 I often bite

 my tongue,

 shuts my mouth

 and hesitates

 at making eye contact

 sometimes.

 I am the butt of every joke,

 the pity plot twist of every story

 and the one who wishes

 not to be a burden

 therefore becomes

 more vintage bottle

 with a cork top

 Than a Woman