Seeing my Heart,

 doesn't necessarily mean, that you'll understand it. Asking for the truth & being given it, does not mean you are going to take it as honesty either. This heart, this heart of mine, has learned how to make sense out of the nonsense & to close itself off from those who don't see this picture as I do. This heart has learned the happy medium between being a major organ & the main storage unit. Adapting its compacity to expand over time & adapting the sound of its own beat so that if anyone falls in love with it, the unique sound could be picked out from a universe full of countless hearts. Seeing my heart one who's not trained will not know how to truly see it. This heart, paper mache, a college of debris, glass shards like mosaics of mirrors that used to hold my reflection & the reflection of others all being those who couldn't decipher the message hidden within the microscopic details. This heart, so many materials & images overlapping one another, an exoskeleton of glue & close-knit stitching. This heart, if need to be could be a tower-like fortress in its own design. Seeing my heart to understand it is a rabbit hole you're digging alone, to the center core where the ink pens will have voices, the bed & the pillows hollowed out & are refilled with written on parchment the ink pens won't disclose the little = woman is silent, but her tears scream, her head is a cluttered library, but her thoughts are the literary guardians. My heart if it does not know you will become a Wonderland will try its best to confuse you, If you get hold of one of the books the library holds, that the keeper protects you'll see for yourself the broken back, ripped. The book was left unrecognizable, stained from water damage, or otherwise partially scorched pages covered in vandalism. Seeing my heart is willing to look past what I allowed you to see & looking closer at what you think I am trying to hide. It's looking at the picture in the mirror & looking at the infant pictures that'll show. Seeing my heart, this heart, even with time & full access doesn't necessarily mean you'll understand it. It took me years to rebuild it to the point it looks like a heart and is easily distinguished from what has happened to it. This heart, my heart needs to be seen, before it can be allowed to be understood.